


Seven Minutes...

by FeliciaAmelloides



Series: A Oneshot a Day... [40]
Category: South Park
Genre: Badly Written, Kenny Dies, LITERALLY, Life Saving, M/M, Rushed, Seven Minutes In Heaven, Suicide, he's not the only one
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-09
Updated: 2018-02-09
Packaged: 2019-03-28 19:54:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,254
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13911036
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FeliciaAmelloides/pseuds/FeliciaAmelloides
Summary: Kenny is immortal. It doesn't matter when he dies.But when Butters dies saving his life, strange things start to happen. And he only has seven minutes to find out more.





	Seven Minutes...

**Author's Note:**

> This is sort of a badly written beginning to what could have been a longer fic. The prompt and my chosen plot had too much potential to be an open-and-closed oneshot, so sorry about that.
> 
> Not sure how it turned out- I've been dealing with a lot emotionally lately to the point that I actually forgot to update yesterday, something which I've never done before (past late updates have been from being too busy to write, not from completely forgetting about it). I'll still be a bit flaky for a few days, so if my writing quality suffers then that's why. Writing helps me take my mind off things. It's fun.
> 
> TW- suicide, death, grieving?

Kenny found it all too tempting to leap up and kill himself sometimes.

He wasn't depressed, or hating life or anything. As an immortal fourth grader there wasn't really much to hate. All his stupid mistakes which led to his death were reversed every time, so there weren't many consequences as long as he didn't hurt anyone else.

And that's exactly why he needed to kill himself.

It had been stupid, really. He'd been crossing the street to get somewhere- the place was hazy now- when the car had come speeding round the corner. It was just his luck; even if he wasn't in the episode he generally died off screen. But this time, someone had actually noticed. Someone had actually cared enough to try to save him. Someone had cared enough to sacrifice their single, ephemeral life for his infinite amount.

Now Butters was dead. Forever.

And he'd still died anyway the same day when the out of control car careening into them both had spontaneously combusted.

Kenny didn't really understand Heaven and Hell. Whenever he died he always ended up being in the former, but only very briefly, before being cast down to Hell. As such, he was pretty good friends with Satan by this point. But what he didn't expect was that Butters had ended up in Heaven as well. And despite not being a Mormon, he was there for good.

When Kenny returned, he had expected everyone to be grieving for Butters. But to his surprise, it didn't really seem like many people cared. Those who were close to him were subdued and kept to themselves, and a respectful silence descended upon his class for the first couple of days. But then, everything started to return to normal. It was too soon; he thought. He didn't get why.

So there he stood, leaning out over the railing of the abandoned remnants of a building near his house, handgun pressed to his temple. He needed answers. And being alive wasn't going to help him to get them. A familiar pang of fear passed through his chest briefly. It was a dull ache, worn away by the familiarity of death. He ignored it and pulled the trigger.

Bang.

White light flooded the blond's vision for a few seconds before he opened his eyes. His parka was still wrapped comfortingly around his body. But there was no time to dwell on that. With an air of determination, Kenny strode through the gates of Heaven and straight past the guard at the gate who stared after him with an expression of mild boredom and contempt. Kenny ignored him. He only had seven minutes to find Butters. Ironic, really. It was just like the game teenagers played at parties, trying to rig it to end up with the person they wanted to fuck the most.

Fortunately, Butters wasn't too hard to find. He stood near the gate, a forlorn expression on his face. Kenny called his name, racing towards him. He looked up, eyes wide, and started running for him as well. They met in the middle as if they were in some shitty movie.

"Ken! You came back for me!" Butters grinned, and Kenny couldn't help but notice the white robe he was now donning. It suited him.

" 'Fraid not. I only have about six minutes before I'm kicked out." Kenny sighed a little melodramatically to mask the urgency in his voice.

"H-hold on... Kicked out? But this is Heaven. And you're dead!"

"That's exactly it. I can't die." The shock on Butters' face reminded the other faintly of when they were playing superheroes and he'd told his friends about his power. Of course, they hadn't believed him at the time, but maybe Butters would be different

"So how're you here?" Was all he asked, without a shred of doubt in his voice. That was a first.

"I don't know," Kenny answered honestly, simply because he had no time to come up with a lie and there would be no point in lying to Butters anyway, "But I die all the time. It's like the universe hates me or something. And every time, I come back." He searched Butters face again for the irritation, the disbelief, anything. He didn't see a thing.

"Then that's why you left earlier! I got worried that the angels kicked you out because you were evil or somethin'." Laughing with relief, Butters fixed him with another cheery smile. Kenny could only stare back in shock.

"They did kick me out," he eventually replied, "Every time I die, I'm sent to Heaven for about seven minutes. Then I go to Hell until it's time to come back. Sometimes that takes a minute, other times it can be months. So... you shouldn't have had to die like that. Saving me, I mean. I would have come back the next day anyway." Despite not being able to feel anything physically, his chest ached upon admitting that. For a moment, Butters looked crestfallen. Then, he smiled again.

"Well, wish I'd known Ken. But at least I get t'see Heaven, right?" And that was it.

"How are you so calm about this? You literally wasted your life!" Finding his anger rising, Kenny struggled to keep it in check. He couldn't snap. There wasn't enough time.

"Um... y'see..." Butters frowned and looked at the clouds which made up the ground (and everything else) before continuing, "...My life wasn't all that great before I ended up here. I miss my friends and my mom and dad, but there're lots of things I don't miss about them too. So I don't really mind I guess! There're worse ways to spend eternity after all." With another small smile, Kenny found himself completely bewildered. Someone so positive and cheerful shouldn't have had to die so early. There must have been some other way! It hurt all the more that no one back in the living world even cared that he was gone. Before he could say something of that nature, Butters spoke again.

"Do they ever talk about me? The fellas, I mean." Oh. A question like that. Looking into Butters' eyes, Kenny knew that there was still no point in lying. So he didn't.

"Sometimes they do, yeah. But not as often as they should. And that's kind of the problem. No one's been talking about you. I think... they might be forgetting you." Butters' eyes became saucers, but quickly reverted back to their usual state.

"That isn't normal?" Something about the way he asked it broke Kenny's currently non-existent heart. He shook his head vehemently.

"No. It's not. There should be more fuss right now than there is, and I think it's something to do with the way you died. Or namely, the fact that you knew I was going to die and did something about it. I've never met anyone else who's done that." Spilling out his true theory, Kenny still watched for Butters' reaction. He looked pensive, as if going over what the other was saying. That made sense. It was a lot to take in in six minutes.

Wait. Six minutes?!

Without any warning, the clouds parted from below Kenny's feet. Caught off guard, he let out an embarrassing yelp as he began to plummet. Faintly he heard Butters call his name from far above, but he was already falling too far. Hell was coming fast, and there was nothing he could do about it.

The meeting was over before it had even begun.

**Author's Note:**

> I didn't know how to end it. Take that as a cliffhanger please.
> 
> Sorry I'm really tired.
> 
> Prompt- Seven minutes in Heaven.
> 
> Original Number- 95.


End file.
